May Your Thanksgiving Be Gentle

 May your Thanksgiving be gentle. It’s a phrase I saw over a year ago, and I’m sharing it again today. 

The holidays aren’t warm and fuzzy for everyone. For many of you they are a loud, chaotic reminder of a life you worked really hard to escape. 

I’m here to tell you that despite what you’ve been raised to believe, it’s ok to NOT participate in celebrations. You aren’t a bad person if you do what’s best for you. 

That drunk uncle? The gaslighting cousin? The grandparents that are hyper critical and make you feel like trash? They probably don’t pay your bills. If they do, that’s another discussion for a different day. Back on point, though, do what you need to do to survive. Unless it’s self medication. Don’t do that. 

For some of you, the holiday is a negative reminder of a loved one(or two, or three) who are gone before you’d like. A wise woman once told me: “Grief is a tricky bitch, it feels evil however it's founded in love.  Here again we tend to feel the "negative" more than the joy of valuing how another impacted our life.” 

WOW. What a profoundly spectacular reminder of a life of love. 

Maybe your family traditions are all sunshine and roses. You enjoy every moment of togetherness and have no anxieties about the days.

Congratulations to you! 

As you forge ahead, this day, remind yourself that many you encounter, may be feeling the exact opposite. Extend to everyone an attitude of grace and thanksgiving.